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| And not many days after, the younger son gathered all together, journeyed to a far country, and there wasted his possessions with prodigal living. But when he had spent all, there arose a severe famine in that land, and he began to be in want. Then he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country, and he sent him into his fields to feed swine. And he would gladly have filled his stomach with the pods that the swine ate, and no one gave him anything.
But when he came to himself, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger! I will arise and go to my father, and will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you, and I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired servants.”'
And he arose and came to his father. But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him.
- Luke 15:13-20
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| As I was reading Ravi Zacharias' autobiography. I couldn't seem to get over the part of his failed suicide attempt and the transformation:
It was also a huge paradigm shift for me to suddenly see life - my own and others' - through the eyes of God. For years, I had looked at life the way a kid might work through a puzzling, new toy, taking it apart but not knowing how to put it back together again. He wonders, 'What makes this thing tick?' So he takes a screwdriver and tries to unpack it, but with each piece he removes, it makes less sense.
Only Jesus could legitimately explain the multifarious strands of human personality locked with me. He could explain my emotional life, my actions, and my reactions. He could explain why I longed for human touch, and why it was actually the touch of soul that I was ultimately after. Without Christ, I still would have the gnawing undercurrent that had run through everything in my life and that had led me to the tragic choice that very nearly brought me to an end.
Who am I? I could now answer it. "I am yours, Oh Lord."
I'll bring you more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what you have required.
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart
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| Two years. It's been on repeat over and over the past week in my car. Nearer My God to Thee. This time in Chinese, many thanks to friends who just happened to be going back to Taiwan, and returned with CD's I requested. Listening to what my grandmother heard two years ago over and over before she left. Miss you, grandma. Nearer My God to Thee. | | |
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